That Dreaded "S" Word

You know what word I hate?

Take a guess. It starts with "S".

Got it? No? Well, it's "shopping". Shopping. *shudder*

I've always hated shopping. Shopping for clothes, that is. I've never been one to just hang around a mall. I avoided them. I'd make a list, run in, grab it, and leave, like the place was about to blow up. I hated walking by every store front, with their skinny/big boobed manequins, staring at me. It was like these life-less assholes were laughing at me. I'd never be able to fit into those clothes. Ever. Talk about depressing. Of course, most of these stores carry L & XL sizes, but c'mon ... who do they think they're kidding. That shit wouldn't even go over my head. I saw a new size the other day ... 00. Really? Double Zero? WTF is that?! Ugh.

Anytime I NEEDED clothes (and I mean, desperately needed ... my pants had to have holes in them), I'd get worried. The worst is when you're in the change room with an outfit, and BAM! It doesn't fit. So you're sitting there, waiting for the lovely lady to come back with a bigger size, and then a bigger one, until you just grab something off the rack quickly that you HOPE will fit, or leave empty handed.

Well, throughout this journey so far, I kept thinking, ONE DAY I will be able to go into a store, pick something off the rack that I love, buy it, and be happy.

That day was yesterday.

I walked into Old Navy with my mom (a store that I have always admired, but haven't fit in in a very long time), who was looking for some new summer-y outfits. I see shirts. LOTS of shirts. That I love. So I decided to try them on.

Damnit. It meant going into the dreaded change room.

But I did. I was brave.

Not only was I brave, but I was freaking fabulous! Every shirt I picked up that I liked, FIT ME. YES YES YES. It fit. And it was also 2-3 sizes smaller than what I used to wear. I used to be a 2x-3x in shirts, and I bought tank tops yesterday that were a LARGE and shirts to go over-top that were X-LARGE.

The best part of it all? The look on my Moms' face.

I thought she was going to cry. Then I realized she was admiring the shirts I was wearing because we're now the same size, and she was seeing which one she wanted to borrow first.

Now, I know you're wondering what these fantabulous shirts look like. First, here are some random "before" pictures.

I used to love that blue shirt. Probably because it showed a lot of boob.

Annnnd here is a picture of my new shirts.

2-3 sizes down.

A lot more weight to lose.

But, for the first time in a long time ... I'm happy. One of my goals (as you may remember from a previous blog post) was to go shopping. I did it. I loved it. I may have a new obsession.

This journey as a ton of ups and downs, good and bad days. But all the positivity is what keeps me going. Seeing side-by-side before and after pictures, feeling the "smaller" clothes, the looks I get from people I haven't seen in a while.

I'm on a happy high right now. I'm loving life. Loving my progress. And wouldn't change a damn thing.

Happy Monday! Go be FABULOUS.

Caitie
-xo-